Fallout: New Vegas Review

Overview

• Title: Fallout: New Vegas
• Platforms: Xbox 360, PS3, and PC
• Year: 2010
• Developer: Obsidian Entertainment
• Publisher: Bethesda Softworks
• Rating: 8.75/10.00
• Replayability: Moderate

Summary:

Fallout: New Vegas is the sequel (or rather somewhat of a spiritual sequel) to the 2008 game of the year, Fallout 3. Fallout: New Vegas is a post-apocalyptic first person shooter about a package courier for the business, Mojave Express. The Courier is intercepted by a casino chairman for the casino, The Tops, named Benny, who captures them with a group of the notorious chem dealers, the Great Khans, and shoots them in the head. Miraculously, the player survives the head shot, wakes up in the local doctor for the town of Goodsprings, Doc Mitchell, who fixes them up and gives them various tests on the vit-o-matic vigor tester (F:NV's version of the "You're S.P.E.C.I.A.L." book, and some Rorschach inkblot tests. After the tests, the player is given the choice of 2 traits of many (increased with the DLCs), and is sent on their way. The player is also given the option to start the game in "Hardcore" mode, where stimpaks heal over time, doctor's bags heal the player's limbs only partially, crippled limbs can only be healed by a doctor or a doctor's bag, sleeping in an owned bed no longer heals the player's limbs, the player must drink water, eat food, and sleep or they will suffer malicious effects, and eventually die. This option is recommended for experienced players only, and if finished to the end, the player is awarded a 100G achievement or a Gold trophy. Once the player leaves they are to meet Sunny Smiles to receive firearms training, and the tutorial, which can be skipped but the player will miss out on plenty of EXP. After the player leaves Goodsprings in search of Benny at Primm, a town overrun by escaped Powder Gangers from the NCR Correctional Facility. The Powder Gangers are a group of explosive-savvy gangsters from Vault 19. After Primm shows no results in the search, The Courier travels to Nipton, where they find that Caesar's Legion has raided it and killed everyone in town. They also put out a lottery and 4th prize is crucifiction, 3rd is instant death, 2nd place is getting your legs broken, and 1st is getting let free. In Nipton, there is a broken and burning house with two skeletons that are named Owen and Beru (Wild Wasteland only). I'll let you figure that joke out. Once the player leaves, they travel to the remains of Boulder City, where some Great Khans have taken some NCR troopers hostage, and the player can either kill the Khans, the NCR, or make a compromise. The actions taken by the player effect the player's reputation with a certain faction, for example, if the player killed a whole platoon of NCR troopers, the player won't be too popular with them, but will be popular with the NCR's rival, Caesar's  Legion for extreme brutality, which is their expertise. After Benny doesn't show up, the Khans tell the player that Benny is at his casino, the Tops. The player has to travel through the town of Freeside, a rundown old town filled with thugs, NCR squatters, and the native gang of Elvis impersonators, the Kings. The player can either ally with them, and kill the NCR troopers stationed there, or vice-a-versa. To gain entrance to the New Vegas strip, the player either needs a science skill of 75, 2,000 caps, or a passport from the King. Once on the strip, the player is given an invite to the Lucky 38. The Lucky 38 is Mr. House's (the De-facto ruler of the strip) sanctuary where nobody has set foot in for over 200 years. Once you enter the Tops, you can either kill Benny, negotiate with Benny (with sufficient speech and barter) or get tricked by him into waiting for him in the presidential suite, where he flees and is captured by Caesar's Legion. Once you leave, Vulpes Inculta (met at Nipton) hands the player the mark of Caesar, clearing them of any crimes toward the Legion, and guarantees them free pass into their camp in Cottonwood Cove. An NCR officer offers the player an invite to the major at the NCR base on the Strip. The player chooses a faction to finish the remainder of the game with at this point. If they chose Mr. House, they are promoting the protection of the strip. If NCR, they are promoting the protection of the wastes, and them pushing the Legion back East. If Legion, the player is promoting slavery and to eliminate the NCR in the Mojave. If the player chooses Yes Man, (Benny's reprogrammed securitron who is always cheerful) they are promoting a free strip. Once the game ends, depending on your choices in the Mojave, the courier effects many lives and with some extra help on the way of the secondary factions, and several companions, all with their own useful perk. The game ends with a slideshow after the battle of the Hoover Dam, and provides closure on the events after the battle. 

Overview:

New Vegas features many of the veteran factions from other Fallouts, such as the Brotherhood of Steel, Caesar's Legion, and the NCR, just to name a few. Also returning is many of the weapons and features of Fallout 3. Making debut appearances is Hardcore mode, the Companion Wheel, which makes dealing with companions easier, such as swapping gear, changing their combat styles, making them wait, how close they follow you etc. Also, there is a host of fantastic DLCs, quests, and the story is very interesting. Unfortunately, the game's ending cannot be extended past as it could with Fallout 3's Broken Steel DLC. The game has many useful and unique weapons, like the "Oh, Baby!" super sledge, or the "Pushy" Power Fist. New Vegas also adds the option to use the gun's iron sights as opposed to just a slight zoom and a small crosshair. The game scraps Three-Dog, and replaces him with Mr. New Vegas, and playing the part of him is Wayne Newton, who has his own radio show as his radio personality, Mr. Las Vegas.

Final Words: 

I had plenty of fun with this game although sometimes it was difficult at times where i saved in wrong spots. Also after a bit of Legion questing, I decided to switch, and killed all of the Legion. This put me in a position of weakness and only able to go with Yes Man, which made me mad. Overall, this game was a winner and has consumed many of my hours, and gave much frustration. The game is achievement heaven and me, being the little achievement whore I am, was well adorned to the whole experience. Overall the Game with me, wins an 8.75 Deathclaws out of 10

Fallout New Vegas Dead Money DLC Review

The DLCs: -

Recently I purchased the three Fallout: New Vegas DLCs, and I recently finished the last one (technically the first, but i played them in a weird order of Honest Hearts, Old World Blues, and Dead Money), and it was obviously the most difficult out of the three. The DLCs are very much worth the purchase but due to the difficulty, it almost ruined the experience for me, but the end sort of makes it worth it.

Summary: -

The DLC sends out a radio broadcast inviting the Courier to the grand opening of the Sierra Madre Casino, and the way-point directs the player to the abandoned BoS bunker on the far eastern side of the Mojave. When the player steps into the bunker after seeing a lone radio in the next room, if the player steps too close, they are knocked out by a knocked out by a few gas sprayers. Next, the player is introduced to the story of the Sierra Madre and how it didn't make it through the war, but still stood and was mostly functioning. After the story, the player is awoken by Father Elijah, a former Brotherhood, that is spoken of by the player companion, Veronica. He tells the player that they need to pull off a heist in the vault of the Sierra Madre with the three other living people in the Villa, Dean Domino (a ghoul who was a pre-war singer and entertainer who was to perform at the Sierra Madre before the war), Dog or God (A super mutant nightkin, both the same person, but God is Dog's subconscious), and Christine (a scarred mute who has been hunting Father Elijah through the Mojave, and the Big Empty, and was trapped in a broken Auto-Doc. later revealed to be Veronica's ex-lover before they were separated). The three of you have to cooperate or have the explosive collars on your necks (or in Dog's case, in his stomach) detonate. Also, scattered around the Sierra Madre, are speakers and radios which will emit a signal that will cause the Courier's collar to beep faster and faster causing the collar to detonate after a short amount of time (slowed down and delayed with Christine's companion perk). The Sierra Madre is also littered with a gaseous substance called the cloud that will poison the player, while they are in it, lowering their HP steadily and by a moderate amount (delayed by the Dean's companion perk). Most of the enemies are Ghost creatures that must be dismembered to be killed permanently (with Dog's companion perk, he devours the foe's limbs when knocked unconscious). The environment is realistic although not very pretty, It fits the bill. The DLC is sort of difficult, but only because it isn't really clear where it is safe to stay without your head being blown off of your shoulders, but once you get the hang of the map, it gets a little easier to navigate and survive. The quests can be confusing at times, particularly the one where you get to Dean Domino's Gala event position and when I had to guide Dog to his, he glitched through the floor and got stuck. The  combat is rewarding and by the end, I had 168 pounds of knife spears and throwing spears and plenty of police pistols. The first gun you get, the holorifle, is useful as it does recurring damage for 8 seconds and has gotten me through many a prickly situation. After a bit, if you spent your SM chips on less useful items, the stimpaks become increasingly rare, making you want to add points to sneak. Once you get to the Sierra Madre, There is a grueling security system of indestructible holograms that shoot punishing lasers, so you are best to just avoid them. The path leading up to the vault is pretty difficult, littered with holograms and speakers, some destructible, some shielded, so look out for the blue light to make your journey a little easier. Once you get past all that and get the vault, you must either have a bunch of high stats for the speech checks that the final dialogue brings, or 100 science and an affinity for hacking terminals, or else you will be locked in the vault and get a premature game over, and your save will be reloaded. Also, I may have forgot to mention that you will find 35 or so gold bars worth ~10,000 fucking caps, but at the expense of them being 35 pounds each, making it hard to escape with a lot, along with plenty of pre war money and Sierra Madre chips. Getting out of the Casino is fairly easy, although on your way out, you have at least 1 minute to get out of the place, or your collar will explode. Upon exiting the Casino, your collar will disengage, and you will then have a fuller exploring experience for the lack of danger of exploding around every corner, making it a billion times easier to find the Dean's secret stashes. You are then at your leisure to leave the Sierra Madre, but are forever unable to return, so make up your mind before you leave.

Overall: -

 Dead Money is the least fun of the 3 DLCs I played, for the very reason that is was difficult in the sense of that is was excruciatingly confusing, and that the combat got to be too much if fighting in a cloud or if you didn't watch for traps (but if you have the God companion he gives you essentially the light step perk). The atmosphere is right, but the delivery falls a little bit short, but it is sort of worth it in the end, when you receive the treasure. This DLC gets 2 gold bars out of 5

I will be reviewing other games as well, such as the main game, Brink, the Assassin's Creed trilogy provided I finish them in time, and whatever I can get my hands on. Thanks for reading if anyone out there is even reading this. I took a break from it for the sole reason that I thought nobody would read them, but when I was describing the  DLCs to my friend, he told me to get it in writing, and came to the deduction that I was too lazy to handwrite them, so I then decided to type them for your reading pleasure. Thanks and I hope you enjoyed the reviews.

Fucking cheers, Jake

Fallout: New Vegas Old World Blues Review

:

The DLCs: -

Recently after selling some games I completed, I had 30 bucks just lying around, and decided to purchase the 3 DLCs for Fallout: New Vegas. The 3 DLCs are Dead Money (no. 1), Honest Hearts (no. 2), and Old World Blues (no. 3). I have finished HH & OWB, and will be reviewing DM soon (within the next few days, and if not, will probably doing the review by next weekend.

Summary: -

In this DLC, the Courier receives a radio signal on their Pip-Boy 3000 to go see a space-age sci-fi movie at the drive-in. When they arrive, the player will notice a crashed space shuttle in the ground, and will have to wait for the midnight showing of the picture show. At midnight, the player will see a projection of an eye on the screen (similar to the one on the cover of the DLC, shown above) coming from the shuttle. The player is given the option to interact with the shuttle and once selected, the option will instigate Old World Blues. A bright blue light envelops the player, and the screen goes dark. A cut-scene will give the prologue of the events that took place at Big MT (MT = mountain, or if read as "em-tee" is known as "the Big Empty" in some circles in the wastes). The DLC starts out with the player waking up on a balcony wearing a patient's gown. The player is guided with the way-point to the think tank, comprised of 5 old-world doctor's brains implanted into levitating monitors with images of two different sized eyes and a mouth. The player is demeaned with a lengthy dialogue sequence with plenty of speech checks of speech, energy weapons, intelligence, perception, medicine, science, and guns. The doctors reveal to you that they removed your spine, heart, and brain, giving you 3 perks that are highly beneficial to the player adding DT and other critical avoidance bonuses. The 5 doctors are Dr. Klein, Dr. 0 (everyone says O the letter but a brief dialogue reveals that it is in fact a zero), Dr. 8, Dr. Dala, and Dr. Borous. Dr. 0 is played by James Urbaniak, the actor who played Rusty Venture in the Adult Swim series, The Venture Brothers, and despises RobCo. Dr. Dala is a female doctor who is obsessed with the human system and it's functions and watches "formography" (what seems to be porn for these robots). Dr. Borous is a no-nonsense doctor similar to Dr. Klein. Dr. 8 is a doctor that speaks gibberish "@@[#-!!!!-#]@@!" and is revealed later to be speaking in the language the RobCo terminal's text is written in when hacking them. After the dialogue, the opposing doctor, Dr. Mobius, is situated in "the Forbidden Zone" across the way in a separate dome. Dr. Mobius created a line of robot scorpions that shoot lasers through their tails. Dr. Mobius has stolen your brain and you must retrieve it. After leaving the Think Tank, there is the Sink, where there is many machines that you can interact with after retrieving their holotapes containing data on what they do. There is an Auto-Doc, a world domination aspiring Toaster, 2 bitchy light switches, an old blues singer sounding jukebox, a mini securitron named muggy obsessed with cleaning mugs, a machine that converts plants into "salient green", (an obvious reference to the movie "Soylent Green" with Charlton Heston), and a book chute that can convert a burned book or any miscellaneous book into a blank book which can be turned into a stat raising skill book with the proper recipe and ingredients at any workbench. The world around it is littered with lobotomites, robobrains, and robot dogs (similar to Rex from the Mojave Wasteland), and fairly good weapons. Many of the weapons are energy weapons, unarmed, and melee, and a lot have EMP damage, which is useful, seeing as a lot of the enemies are robotic or cyborgs. There is a sneaking suit called the X-13 Sneak Suit that, when upgraded fully (through testing in the X-13 testing facility) grants +25 Sneak, +20% sneak running speed, and it fucking TALKS. You read right, it talks. the suit will alert you when your Pip-Boy light is on, and will administer stimpaks and Med-X as necessary. Also, it will occasionally say that you will be friends forever, and if your character is female, it wall ask what doctor you think is most attractive. After many brief fetch quests, the player goes into Dr. Mobius' forbidden zone, where they confront a giant robo-scorpion. After the fight, the player goes into Mobius' lab, where they see that he is very busted up and isn't as malicious as he appears in recordings past. Once you go up a staircase, you see a machine, and in the machine, is your brain. Your brain is very dickish as your character points out, and is very hellbent on staying in the machine. After the dialogue with your brain, your character then returns to the think tank to confront the doctors. After another dialogue sequence or a fight sequence, the player's journey into the Big Empty, the ending sequence plays, the player is given a gun that doesn't shoot projectiles, but instead will transport the player back to Big MT, so long as the player would normally be able to fast travel.

Overall: -

The loot in OWB is sub-par as compared to the other DLCs but the Sneak Suit is incredibly helpful, and many of the weapons are helpful in the wasteland. Otherwise, the DLC is fun, but sort of difficult in places, seeing as there are very few healing items, and tough combat, so it isn't something for levels below 15. The combat, however is rewarding, seeing as when I started, I was level 21, and ended at 28. The dialogue is funny, however it is necessary to have high skills to be fully rewarding, and the Sink's auto-doc allows you to change traits, such as switching to Wild Wasteland, as well as many other new DLC-downloaded traits. The DLC overall earns 3 severed spinal cords out of 5

Honest Hearts: A Fallout New Vegas DLC review

The DLCs :
Recently, I sold some games and purchased Fallout: New Vegas for the second time, wishing to return to the mojave for some more diabolical post-apocolyptic fun. After the first two weeks of working for the notorious slave runner group clad in gladiator-style armor, Caesar's Legion, I decided to purchase the most recent two DLC's (out of 3, soon to be 4, the first being Dead Money in which I will soon be purchasing), Honest Hearts, where you go to Utah's Zion National Park with a trading caravan, and Old World Blues, where you go to "Big Mountain", A.K.A "Big MT" or "The Big Empty". Anyway back to Honest Hearts.


Summary:
In this fantastic DLC, the Courier gets a radio signal on their Pip-Boy 3000, telling them that a job is waiting at the northern pass north of New Vegas, and east of where the player finds the unique gauss rifle, or the Alien Blaster (Wild Wasteland trait only). The player meets with Jed Masterson, a Trader and his caravan, on a journey to Utah's Zion National Park for trading purposes. Allowed only 75 pounds of equipment (100 with a 70 Survival skill speech check), the caravan sets off for Utah. The player is introduced with the legend of the "Burned Man" or, Joshua Graham, The Caesar's Legate previous to Lanius. After the intro, the caravan and their crew is ambushed by a native tribe known as the "White Legs". After the fight, the Courier is joined by a native of a different tribe "the Dead Horses" named Follows Chalk. Follows guides you to Joshua Graham, now one of the leading influences in the war of the tribes. He directs you (after a brief quest) to an associate named Daniel. He pairs you up (after dismissing Follows) with another member of the tribe,  Walking Cloud. She accompanies you on your journey in killing some Yao Guai (giant mutated grizzly bears) and disarming traps. The DLC's map is littered with Survivor's Duffel Bags telling a story of a survivor of the Great War emerging only days after the bombs fell. There is a challenge associated with finding all eight of his spots, reminiscent of the Rat Man's dens in Portals 1&2, but sadly no achievement. Honest Hearts comes with 5 achievements, all of which are story-acquired. 4 can be done naturally but the 5th can only be earned by reloading a previous save before the main quest  is initiated, where you either evacuate Zion, to escape the White Legs, going it Daniel's preferred way, or confronting the tribe head on, Joshua's way. The enemy tribe's leader, Salt-in-Wounds, is captured and through either a brief dialogue sequence, or a series of speech checks, the player can either choose to kill him (the former) or spare him (the latter, after a speech check of 50, and 90). After this, the DLC is wrapped up in the style of the ending after the battle of the Hoover Dam, and the player is presented with a footlocker containing the clothes of Daniel, the outfit of Joshua Graham, the headdresses of both Follows Chalk and Salt-in-Wounds, Salt-in-Wound's power fist, and Joshua's .45 auto Pistol known as A Light Shining in Darkness. After this, the player is at their freedom to either explore Zion, or return to the Mojave Wasteland, and continue on their business as normal.

Overall:
The loot in Honest Hearts is up to snuff with previous DLC's (excluding Fallout 3's Operation: Anchorage DLC, seeing as you get indestructible T51B armor, Chinese sneak suit, Jing-Wei's Shock Sword, etc. when, paired with 100 sneak, 10 Luck, and 10 Agility, made the game impossible to die, so long as you sneak at all times), with good unique weapons, and nice looking armor.

With me, this game wins 4 dead Yao Guai cubs out of 5

Check out Davie-Boy's Deathly Hallows pt. 2 review

http://nightspringsaz.blogspot.com/2011/07/harry-potter-and-deathly-hallows-part-2.html

Great review
Look at it
I love you
Goodbye

Fucking Cheers, Jake

Check out Davie-boy's Green Lantern review

http://nightspringsaz.blogspot.com/2011/06/green-lantern-reviewed-510.html

Follow that fucking bullshit.
Now
No post for this weekend.
except this
this isn't a post.


Fucking cheers, Jake

Extreme Adverts

On a totally unrelated note, i found out that my sister's car got wrecked, but it was no big deal because she got an interview with Nike. Damn straight the fucking sport shit company. give her a cheer. now that that's over with, cool. have a good one and check out the pics

One liners to the mac, brah! you'll love them

Note: if you have as a friend on Facebook, than you've already seen these and may ignore this post. If you are a stranger, come on in, take your pants shoes off and sit by the fire. you're in for a treat, friend

1 I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

2 Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

3 I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

4 The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list.

5 Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. “Yes” is the answer.

6 Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.

7 We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.

8 Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand.

9 We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

10 Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

11 Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

12 War does not determine who is right – only who is left.

13 If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong.

14 The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

15 Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.

16 Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.

17 If sex is a pain in the ass, then you’re doing it wrong…

18 Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

19 Evening news is where they begin with ‘Good evening’, and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.

20 A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..

21 My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.

22 I didn’t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian

23 If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.

24 I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.

25 If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.

26 Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.

27 If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea… does that mean that one enjoys it?

28 Some people are like Slinkies … not really good for anything, but you can’t help smiling when you see one tumble down the stairs.

29 How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

30 Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?

31 A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don’t need it.

32 Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

33 Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

34 To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

35 A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

36 I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with “Guess” on it…so I said “Implants?”

37 Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

38 A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

39 The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!

40 Good girls are bad girls that never get caught.

41 Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

42 Laugh at your problems, everybody else does.

43 The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

44 Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says “If an emergency, notify:” I put “DOCTOR”. What’s my mother going to do?

45 He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.

46 The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

47 I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

48 Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

49 God must love stupid people. He made SO many.

50 Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

51 The sole purpose of a child’s middle name, is so he can tell when he’s really in trouble.

52 Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.

53 Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.

54 Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.

55 My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.

56 Some people say “If you can’t beat them, join them”. I say “If you can’t beat them, beat them”, because they will be expecting you to join them, so you will have the element of surprise.

57 Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.

58 It’s not the fall that kills you; it’s the sudden stop at the end.

59 Crowded elevators smell different to midgets.

60 Hospitality: making your guests feel like they’re at home, even if you wish they were.

61 You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

62 Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.

63 I discovered I scream the same way whether I’m about to be devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot.

64 A bargain is something you don’t need at a price you can’t resist.

65 My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re ugly too.

66 I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

67 Money can’t buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.

68 A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.

69 We have enough gun control. What we need is idiot control.

70 You’re never too old to learn something stupid.

71 I should’ve known it wasn’t going to work out between my ex-wife and me. After all, I’m a Libra and she’s a bitch.

72 A little boy asked his father, “Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?” Father replied, “I don’t know son, I’m still paying.”

73 With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine.

74 Women may not hit harder, but they hit lower.

75 Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil.

76 There’s a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can’t get away.

77 I don’t trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn’t die.

78 Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen.

79 Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?

80 I always take life with a grain of salt, …plus a slice of lemon, …and a shot of tequila.

81 If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you!

82 I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not sure.

83 When in doubt, mumble.

84 I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.

85 To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

86 Jesus loves you, but everyone else thinks you’re an asshole.

87 A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.

88 A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.

89 Just remember…if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.

90 I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, “I’m going to mop the floor with your face.” I said, “You’ll be sorry.” He said, “Oh, yeah? Why?” I said, “Well, you won’t be able to get into the corners very well.”

91 Some people hear voices.. Some see invisible people.. Others have no imagination whatsoever.

92 You are such a good friend that if we were on a sinking ship together and there was only one life jacket… I’d miss you heaps and think of you often.

93 When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

94 Hallmark Card: “I’m so miserable without you, it’s almost like you’re still here.”

95 Virginity is like a soapbubble, one prick and it is gone.

96 Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

97 If winning isn’t everything why do they keep score?

98 If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you’ll have trouble putting on your pants.

99 If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child.

100 Whoever coined the phrase “Quiet as a mouse” has never stepped on one.

Hope these one liners brightened your day, have fun doing that thing that we both know you didn't do.

                                       Fucking cheers, Jake

the blog is here

so i am jake and i like to play xbox. it's pretty swell. my gamertag is silvereye 006. hit me up and we can play call of duty mw2, WAW,. i like to play fallout 3 and new vegas. when im not playing videogames till 5 AM i like to be on the computer. Im 15 and am 5'4". the name's Jake. check out my bro david at

Nightspringsaz.blogspot.com

yeah... more updates soon

                                  Fucking cheers, Jake